50+ Hilarious South Park Quotes, Sayings And Captions

By Akash
south park quotes sayings

South Park is a real deal when it comes to its dialogue that’s why we picked up the best South Park quotes and sayings that may you like – we update this list on a daily basis.

Cartman – This is how the world works, If you want to find some quality friends you have to wade through all the d*cks first.

Stan: We’re all looking for an answer, you know. We all want to understand who we are and where we come from, but sometimes we want to know the answers so badly that we believe just about anything.

Cartman- Mmm, your tears are so yummy and sweet

Liane – Sweetie, Bill gates is on the phone for you.
Eric – Tell Bill gates to suck my ass, Mom.

Mr. Garrison – I just don’t trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn’t die.

Dr. Biber – Making brea*ts larger is a beautiful and wonderful thing. Making them smaller is …insane.

Wendy – Breast cancer isn’t funny

Mr. Garrison – There are no stupid answers, just stupid people.

Chef – There’s a time and place for everything and it’s called college.

Butters – A ring that said you’ll be together, but not has s*x isn’t that called a wedding ring?

Kyle – Family isn’t about whose blood you have. It’s about who you care about. And that’s why I feel like you guys are more than just friends. You’re my family.

Randy – If we’re still alive in the morning…then we’ll know we’re not dead.

Cartman – When you pre-order a game you’re just coming to paying for something that some a**hole in California hasn’t even finished working on yet.

Cartman – I’m gonna need a scientist, an engineer, and of course… A black person who can sacrifice himself in case something goes wrong.

Cartman – Stan, don’t you know the first law of physics? Anything that’s fun costs at least $8.

Kyle – I had to become poor all on my own I wasn’t born with a plastic spoon in my mouth.

Kenny – You never fucking care when I die

I’m afraid minors cannot go onto the casino floor.
Cartman – I’m not a miner, dumba*s you see a shovel in my hand.

Cartman – I want to hold your every morning and love you every night, Kyle.

Kyle – You know nothing about Christianity
Cartman – I know how to exploit it.

Butters – Well yea, I’m sad. It’s like, it makes me feel alive, You know? It makes me feel human. The only way I can feel this sad now, is if I felt something really good before. So I have to take the bad with the good. So I guess what I’m feeling is like beautiful sadness.

Kyle – Dying of old age is dying because of not dying

Cartman – Screw you guys, I’m going home[/alert-warning]

Unknown – Yup, nice, and boring. Just the way I like it.[/alert-warning]

Kenny – I think kyle has fake tiddies[/alert-warning]

Goth Kid – Dancing is something you do alone, in your room, at 3 in the morning[/alert-warning]

Randy to (Stan) – You’re a lousy kid! I wish Jaden Smith was my son![/alert-warning]

Panda guy – If you stick your pen*s in another panda’s ear that makes me a saaaad Panda.[/alert-warning]

Cartman – Don’t worry Butters, I’m totally poor and stupid. I’m ready for Nascar.[/alert-warning]

Ms. Choksondik – You can’t counter a profane command with an idle threat! You must extinguish it with vulgar suggestions!
When a child says, “Suck my balls,” you say, “Present them.”[/alert-warning]

Jesus – God can’t just answer every prayer and suddenly give you everything you want. That takes all the living out of live.[/alert-warning]

Kyle Broflovski – All animals kill, and the animals that don’t kill are stupid ones like cows and turtles and stuff[/alert-warning]

Mr. Garrison – Well, your moms are just upset. They’re probably all on their periods or something.[/alert-warning]

Babe stevens – Having tiddies sucks[/alert-warning]

Stan marsh – Yeah. You know, we believe in equality for everybody, and tolerance, and all that gay stuff, but dude, f**k you.’[/alert-warning]

Cartman – I would never let a woman kick my a*s. If she tried something, I’d be like, HEY! You get your bitch a*s back in the kitchen and make me some pie![/alert-warning]

Tweek tweek – But, what if when I’m trying to put on the nose, the snowman comes alive and tries to kill me?[/alert-warning]

Terrance – Hello Muhammad, we’ve read all about you in the Qur’an.[/alert-warning]

Cartman – Oh, the tears of unfathomable sadness! Yummy!’:[/alert-warning]


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